This situation has been going on for several years. Your father, widowed and living alone, has been calling you more and more frequently for help, especially in these last months. Because of certain health issues, he has had to visit his doctor numerous times this past year. Lately, though, his doctor has been admonishing him to get home care.
He just refuses to consider the option.
Home care is one of the best options for elderly and disabled men and women across the country. Unfortunately, due to misconceptions or certain preconceived notions about the cost, availability, or benefits home care can offer, some seniors may flat out refuse to even think about this option.
What can you do now?
Ultimately, your father has the right to decide whether or not he relies on a home care aide, visiting nurse, or other professional coming to his house. This might feel as though it puts you in a bind, but you also have every right to tell him you can no longer offer this kind of help. You have your own life, responsibilities, and perhaps career. All of those things tend to become compromised when people take on the role of a family caregiver.
If your father’s doctor has recommended around-the-clock care, it’s a serious concern.
That means your father is most likely dealing with extremely limited mobility and diminished physical capacity. If he has to get up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, he may be at an elevated risk of falling and being injured.
Your father’s doctor likely knows a lot about his condition.
She has probably seen a lot of other elderly patients in similar physical conditions as your father. She knows what she’s talking about. Your father may not want to admit to these challenges or he may be overly dependent on you because you’ve been there every step of the way for the past several years.
Now is the time to talk openly and honestly.
You need to let him know about your limitations. Advise him about the risks he’s taking trying to do things on his own, depending solely on you. Also, don’t forget to listen. This is one of the most effective communication tools we have, though few of us actually listen as well as we could. There may be some misconceptions or ideas he has about home care he’s tried to express in the past. When you listen to his concerns and what he’s thinking, you will likely find common ground to at least discuss the prospect of hiring home care support services for those overnight hours to start.
If you or an aging loved one are considering home care for seniors in Medford, NJ, please contact the caring staff at TLC HomeCare Services today at 856-234-8700
Kelly C. McCabe is the co-owner of TLC HomeCare Services.In addition to management, marketing and sales, staffing and recruiting, Kelly holds her New Jersey producer’s license in Health and Life insurance and isalso a New Jersey Certified Home Health Aide.Kelly is the proud mother of two daughters and is a resident of Moorestown, NJ.
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